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Sakmongkol ak 47

ariff.sabri@gmail.com

Friday 1 April 2011

One for April fool’s Day

EXTRACT FROM THE BRITISH BROADCASTING AGENCY (BBC) SERIES 'YES, PRIME MINISTER' - 'CONFLICT OF INTEREST' EPISODE:


 

PM Hacker: Don't tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers:


 

The Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country.

The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country.

The Times is read by people who actually do run the country.

The Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country.

The Financial Times is read by people who own the country.

The Morning Star (communist) is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country; and The Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is.


 

Sir Humphrey (Cabinet Secretary): Prime Minister, what about the people who read The Sun?

Bernard (PM's PA): Sun readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits


 

We can gauge Malaysian readers by the same token:


 


 

MSM READERS


 

Utusan is read by people who think they have a God given right to run the country forever and a day.


 

Sin Chew is read by people who think they ought to run the country.


 

NST is read by people who actually do run the country.


 

STAR is read by people who wish Penang ran the country.


 

Borneo Times is read by people who wish the Penan and Bruno Manser ran the country.


 

Sarawak Tribune is read by people who think the Brown Rajahputras from West Malaysia run the country.


 

Tatler is read by the wives of the people who run the country.


 

Business Times is read by the people who actually own the country.


 

Nanyang is read by people who think the country ought to be run by Singapore and/or China, Berita Harian thinks it is, while the Nesan thinks it ought to be Tamil Nadu and/or India!


 

Harakah is read by people who think God and Saudi Arabia should run the country.


 

Sun is read by people who think the country ought to be run by Citizen Nades with advertising revenue and no taxes.


 

The Selangor Times is read by people, both of them, who think Klang Valley residents constitute the entire country and run it.


 

What about the people who read The Mail? Mail readers don't care who runs the country, as long as he or she's got big fondleable tits and is allegedly involved in a sex or financial scandal involving DSAI, Opposition party members,Tim Rais Lloyd Webber, Screwities Commission CEO Czarina Anwar Ibrahim or about a lawsuit filed by the New State Parsley Sage Rosemary Thighmes dishrag against them. Lol!


 


 

BLOG READERS


 

1M100mApco(not Israel), the personal website of the Rosemajibs at http://www.1M(not Israel).flomblogspot.com.portdickson./ is read by bots and decepticons who consume oily roti jala, will grease your back or palms as you desire if you oil their motors and are planning for the Transformers to run the country.


 

Anilnetto.com at http://anilnetto.com/ is read by people who wish trams, funicular railway and ferries ran the country.


 

Another Brick in The Wall at http://anotherbrickinwall.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think Pink Floyd runs the country, rock on and *cuk get lost if you don't agree!


 

ARTiculations at http://art-harun.blogspot.com/ is read by people who wish the Bar Council and lawyers (sharks) ran the country.


 

Barking Magpie at http://www.barkingmagpie.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think closet civil servants run the country.


 

Big Dog's 'The 13 Million Plus Ringgit Guy' at http://bigdogdotcom.wordpress.com/ is read by those who will immediately issue you a red card if you don't agree with their thinking on how to run the country.


 

Can of Book Worms at http://interlockgridlock.blogspot.dbahasa is read by those who think pariahs and "chinamen" who will sell their daughters into slavery and prostitution run the country.


 

Demi Negara at http://deminegara.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think pendatangs are trying to run the country.


 

Din Merican: The Malaysian DJ Blogger at http://dinmerican.wordpress.com/ is read by people who don't care who runs the country as long as there's jazz music.


 

Dr. Mahathir Mohamad at http://chedet.co.cc/chedetblog/ is read by people who think 'apanama I forget' should still rule the country.


 

English For All at http://misedumindopeydin.blogspot.gov.con.pjaya is read by no one who wants to run the country.


 

House PK (Parpukari) at http://www.parpukari.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think they and Dr. Mahathir Mohamad ought to run the country.


 

Human Rights Party at http://www.humanrightspartymalaysia.com/ is read by those who wish Ghandhi could run the country.


 

Lim Kit Siang at Malaysia at http://blog.limkitsiang.com/ is read by people who think Singapore and/or China ought to run the country and Jebat Must Die at http://jebatmustdie.wordpress.com/ by people who think it is.


 

Magick River at http://magickriver.blogspot.com/ is read by people who originally owned the country.


 

Malaysia Today at http://www.malaysia-today.net/ is read by people who think RPK runs the country from London, Sydney, Melbourne, Manchester, Peace Hill, AG Ganesh Patel's Office and everywhere.


 

Malaysian Insider at http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/ is read by people who wish their once 4th floor boys, "oxford merchant bankers" and newspaper editors ran the country.


 

Masterwordsmith-unplugged at http://masterwordsmith-unplugged.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Rainy Morning jokes keeps the country running.


 

Niamah at http://www.niamah.com/ is read by those who enjoy swearing at the country and run it from seafood restaurants.


 

Nikolas Aziz at http://www.whitejangutturbans.blogspot.syurga/ is read by those who want aye for an aye democrats to run the country.


 

No Under Table at http://www.pmazalamtt4tbhstrangleyourself.blogspot.irp.agganeshpatel.gulagrussia is read by those who run the country from the 5th and 15th floor.


 

One Armed Swordsmanship & Beer Drinking At The Same Time at http://kriswaveanchorbeer.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think Kerismudin will be next to run the country.


 

OutSyed The Box at http://syedsoutsidethebox.blogspot.com/ is read by those who predict the Beardo Weirdo Mullahs and Talibans will soon rule the country.


 

Personal Protection & Horse Head at http://www.corleoneahlongenterprise.irp.agganeshpatel.blogspot.sicily is read by those who think the Mafia and Triads runs the country.


 

Rantings by MM (Marina Mahathir) at http://rantingsbymm.blogspot.com/ is read by NGO's and the wives of the people who run the country.


 

rights2write at http://rights2write.wordpress.com/ is ready by people who are stuck with investments in now abandoned housing projects.


 

Roar of the Lion King by Karpal Singh at http://singhisking.guinessstoutblogsspot.goldentemple.amritsar.punjab/ is read by people who think turbanators ought to run the country.


 

Sacred Temples at http://bovinecranium.blogspot.com.shah alam/ is read by people who think cows heads run the country .


 

Sakmongkol AK47at http://sakmongkol.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think UMNO should run 70% of the country and possibly, another 30%.


 

(SatD) Pure Shiite at http://satdthinks.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think the King should run the country.


 

Sighfool Soap Opera at http://www.noshittoday.blogspot.halffootballteam.pussyrawi/ is read by those who support the back four from half a foofball team to run the country from the rear.


 

Sink Not Float For $4 billion at http://www.aminahtuyabaginda.blogspot.com.pardonmyfrench is read by those who think 2nd hand re-conditioned French submarines should run the country.


 

Steadyaku47 at http://steadyaku-steadyaku-husseinhamid.blogspot.com is read by people who want to run the country from down under.


 

Straitjackets at http://isateresakoksinchew.blogspot.chubblocks.com.kamunting/ is read by people who want to lock up everyone who disagrees with them, for their own safety and good, to run the country.


 

Taj Mahal Mansions for $1 at http://www.mbtoyotamolars&trainsarchitects.blogspot.com.bukitkayuhitam/ is read by people who think railway gatekeepers and dentists run the country.


 

To Sleep, Perchance Dream, Abdullah B's 2nd blog at http://zzzzzzdunlopillow.blogspot.com.ripvanwinkleland is read by people who wish railway sleepers, corridors, sil and 4th floor boys ran the country. His first blog 'As I Wake Up' has been retired.


 

Unspinners at http://theunspinners.blogspot.com/ is read by those who think $100 million APCO and $8.2 million McKinsey should run the country.


 

Zorro-unmasked at http://zorro-zorro-unmasked.blogspot.com/ is read by those who wish Catherine Zeta Jones (in black leather boots and brandishing a whip) would run the country.


 

What about the people who read the humongously popular rocky3540 at http://www.carlsbergbru.nurainiblogspot.com.jalansudin/ ? They don't care who runs the country, as long as he or she's got big fondleable tits, is allegedly involved in a sex or financial scandal involving DSAI, Opposition party members, Tim Rais Lloyd Webber, Screwities Commission CEO Czarina Anwar Ibrahim or about a lawsuit filed by the New State Parsley Sage Rosemary Thighmes dishrag against them. Lol!


 

And lastly, donplaypuks® at http://donplaypuks.blogspot.com/ is read by people, both of them, who actually do own and run the country one lah, jom! Isn't it, dontch you know machan? I wish mah. Shirley one. Lol!


 

Bros, don't rush and file your defamation suits against me en mass.


 

Heh, heh, heh! Satire, humour and laughter are good for the soul! Remember, laughter is still the best medicine. People at Electricity (next year name will be changed to Fuckupshima Nuclear) Board , please take note.


 

Courtesy of donplaypuks.

15 comments:

Anonymous,  1 April 2011 at 21:26  

ROTFL!

Anonymous,  1 April 2011 at 22:20  

Darn! Penangites will sure be pissed off for being associated with The Star.

Anonymous,  1 April 2011 at 23:30  

Dear SAK .

Anonymous commentators ( yours truly included ) are those who wish they run the country anonymously and have egos much bigger than the t.ts found in playboy magazines . LOL !!

donplaypuks 2 April 2011 at 01:03  

Wow, I did not expect you would post my blog in full here!

Many thanks Dato. Owe you one.

I enjoy our debates here and the sportsmanship it implies from your end. If only that same spirit would prevail throughout our beloved nation as we strive for a better future for all Malaysians.


dpp
we are all of 1 Race, the Human Race

Anonymous,  2 April 2011 at 02:29  

LMAO~

Good one donplaypuks !!!

Anonymous,  2 April 2011 at 03:34  

donplaypuks..too funny la. hahahah

love my kris

Anonymous,  2 April 2011 at 09:28  

what a rubbish. No more ideas?? So dont talk.

mpn kadaram 2 April 2011 at 12:45  

Thanks Dato, For posting a very humorous satire by brother donplaypuks, with his permission I like to post this in my blog.IT's great brother.

didi,  2 April 2011 at 16:01  

Hahahahahaha!

"Sakmongkol AK47at http://sakmongkol.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think UMNO should run 70% of the country and possibly, another 30%."

I might not agree with this but thanks for making my day Dato'. This just complete an otherwise great week for me,

Anonymous,  2 April 2011 at 16:25  

Apparently folks at Bernama news is also cool with April Fool jokes.....

"Najib confident of winning Penang again in next election" read their headline today.

WTF, the guy just touch down for a couple few hours and that's their conclusion!

greenbottle 2 April 2011 at 16:50  

ahahaha! this is a great post! you should do this more often instead of getting our bp shooting up the roof with your usual ascerbic and bilious take on the bloody umno politicians...

and by the way i ONLY read the guardian among the papers listed and none of the blogs (bloody waste of my precious time)- except yours of course...

didi,  2 April 2011 at 17:24  

Donplaypuks,

I'm sorry I should credit you for this. But thanks for this funny posting.

Anonymous,  3 April 2011 at 23:52  

"Sakmongkol AK47at http://sakmongkol.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think UMNO should run 70% of the country and possibly, another 30%".

silly me. i thought it is a blog on how to pluck mangoes!

Anonymous,  4 April 2011 at 20:50  

Sakmongkol AK47at http://sakmongkol.blogspot.com/ is read by people who think Oracle should run the Country!

BENatang10,  7 April 2011 at 09:43  

Penangites mostly use Star to wrap kitty and doggie's poo... that's what its good for, thrash!

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